I am not a bag of rainbows. I have a vortex within me that I could drown in... and you along with it. I am the baggage that I carry deep within that I cannot cut loose. I wish my hatred didn't overshadow my happiness. I want to move on and yet my heart is anchored in concrete. I try to be present but the shadows follow me even in sunlight. You saved me when I felt like I was dying... and now I can't undo you. I am not a bag of rainbows. I am rain, and storms, and the howling wind.